Submitted by Rodrigo Nava
“The final aim of all love intrigues, be they comic or tragic, is really of more importance than all other ends in human life.” - Schopenhauer.
“What is love?” A question that has invaded the minds of great philosophers and thinkers, and “Is it related to happiness?”. Not just that, it’s probable that every single human being has encountered these doubts and questions floating in their minds, and just thinking “Does true love exist?”. The truth is that true love exists, and not just that, it can appear easily in everyone’s life.
This gratitude story is about how I found true love after giving up on it. It was March 2020, and people started to talk about a virus that was new to all, but we decided to ignore it until it was already too late. At that moment, I was having the worst time of my life, and the worst part is, that it was my choice. I was involved in the most toxic and painful relationship of all, suffering and struggling because I didn’t want to be there with her. I wasn’t listening to my heart and my feelings because I had no freedom at all and I felt harassed at all times. Why did I stay so long if I knew that it wasn’t good for me? Because I was afraid that no-one would ever love me like she did because I depended on her.
The pandemic arrived and finally, after a lot of thinking and suffering, I started to realize that it wasn’t healthy, so I made a decision and decided to leave her… Regardless of what could happen, I took a leap of faith. I had terrible habits, and used to cry all the time; I attracted a lot of bad things into my life and felt like all was falling apart. Everyone around me realized that and started worrying, or distancing from me; I was terribly unhappy, demotivated.
My grandmother always believed in energy, that we all are made by it and we can heal others through it, she taught me that since I was little and I became fascinated with the idea; I dug more deeply and found a lot more things related to that, including gratefulness and meditations; but I didn’t know how to apply them to my life, so it stopped there…
One day, my uncle and I were talking, and he showed me an app that he had just downloaded, it was the Gratitude app, an app that I could use to write about my day and the things I was grateful for. It seemed like an opportunity to me to change, to be more productive, and climb that hole of pitifulness I was stuck in. I had all I needed, motivation, determination, and conviction and I knew now how to apply those things I had learned before, to my life. It started small, small paragraphs every day of the things I was grateful for, but without much detail.
But eventually, I started to write more and more, until I wrote full stories with details; that was a slow change in my life, but when I reflected on the effects it has had on me, I started to notice that my habits were changing very quickly to much healthier ones, with me being involved on a lot of projects of things I loved to do; I started to notice things in my day like the little details we all take for granted and started thinking “I’m going to write about that later”.
I remember being very traumatized about what happened with my ex, and considering all relationships as toxic, “Who wants love if it’s always going to end badly?” I used to think. One great day, I decided to finally let go of my fears and anxieties and talk to the person I’ve always wanted to talk with. I was so in love with her, and really, since the first time I saw her, I fell in love. I really think she's the most wonderful girl (in every aspect) that exists in the world. It’s curious, I gave up on love to find true love. Because she fell in love too… We spent a lot of days talking, laughing until I finally got to see her; I will never forget that day, the way she looked, even more, perfect than in photos. I was just melting. That soft and wonderful sensation I felt when I kissed her lips… That only happened in the movies, how come I was experiencing something so magical?
Now, I’m extremely happy with her, and I’m even more in love than at the beginning. I know that we may have our differences sometimes, but still, I love her so much, that everything goes away with that. In the end, everything happens for a reason and I attracted true love into my life. I made my quarantine, the best time of my life, and even though it’s not over yet, I’m still the happiest man in the world for the things I keep experiencing daily
The improvement I’ve had because of gratitude it’s clear, and it’s that by making those little details about my life more evident, and living every day like it was the last one; everything became a beauty, everything was marvelous. That appreciation for the little things and gratitude towards life made clear that my life was perfect, and that I was too. I became happier, by embracing the suffering at hard times and being grateful for it; and the most important part of it, I learned how to love myself.
That love is what made my girlfriend come into my life, I really believe that, and I’m the luckiest man in the world for having her. Because she’s really the best for me, and I love to love her. I’m grateful to life for the opportunities it has given me, and overall for the gratitude app, that has made a total improvement in my life and has changed it completely.